Dear Saskia, I was hoping your quiet had meant you were spending time with those wonderfully important people in your life but have just discovered your tribute page. I think of you often and in my head you're home with your family or in Switzerland with your partner. I'm going to carry on thinking of you in those places as you were always such a fighter and so strong. You had such battles, Sas, but you faced them with a smile and a determination that I was awed by x

Dearest Saskia I'd always hoped we'd grow from youth to old age together and a part of me is always going to be heartbroken by your loss, even though I carry your friendship within me. I miss your honesty and your ability to call me out. I miss your humour and your chutzpah. I miss your energy and enthusiasm and the beautiful things you made. I miss your capacity for growth and your bravery. I miss our capacity to talk things through when we'd hurt one another and grow stronger in friendship as a result. I miss the way you appreciated me despite my faults.

Saskia Spencer How do you describe a person like Saskia? Indomitable, colourful, creative, happy, determined, full of zest; all of these and so much more. We could stand here for hours and still have plenty to say, but we have to crystalise all we know, love and feel about Saskia to try and capture the essence of who she embodies for each person who knew her. And actually that is quite fitting, for Saskia certainly crystalised so much of life into her 55? years here on Earth. Born as the youngest daughter of Jacquie and Ivan Monty in north London, she grew up with sisters Louise and Susannah, plus cousins and family friends sharing mealtimes, celebrations and even homes. Ivan and Jacquie were very sociable and had lots of friends. It comes as no surprise that it was a high-spirited house with much diverse noise from playful squabbling children – and adults! Louise, Susannah and Saskia were close that even a box of Smarties would be equally divided down to the very last Smartie. Ivan and Jacquie took the girls on family summer holidays to Cornwall, and when Saskia was 4, they took their three young girls on a three month journey through Europe to Israel, travelling and living in a bright yellow camper van, an adventure indeed. Living at Finchley the girls remember dancing to music around the living room, and being woken up on a Sunday morning by loud jazz, folk or pop, even when they were teenagers and wanted to dive under their duvets. Many family photos show Susannah with her arm around Saskia, from that early age stepping into the unspoken caring, guardian role. On reflection it was a cheerful, bohemian, creative, yet unconventional backdrop to their childhood. It also gave all 3 girls a degree of freedom unimagined by many of their contemporaries, and it allowed their individual creativities to flourish and thrive. They all gained an amazing aptitude for self-sufficiency. Saskia was very self-reliant; the odd complaint about having to do something, but she always did it. Just maybe Saskia didn’t realise how creatively talented she was against such an artistically gifted background. As a young girl Saskia was a great mimic and could do impressions of people on the tv at the drop of a hat, one of her many talents. The Headmaster even wrote a letter saying how highly he regarded her work when she was only 11. She played the piano so well that her teacher found her a scholarship, but she decided against it. Luckily she has passed on that talent to Luke, and indeed played again these last few years. Her mother said “Saskia, who I think despite numerous abilities, should have been a stand-up comedian! Laughter was an integral part of Saskia’s personality and a massive part of her friendships; she was fun, fun, fun, and shared a special bit of her unique laughter with each friend. She saw her friends as her extended family, and was exacting of them. Saskia gave so much of herself, her warmth, her generosity, her love, and we tried to live up to her exacting standards. Not that she ever asked anything of anyone else that she wouldn’t demand of herself. She would test you to the limits – but the rewards were glorious. Saskia would turn up unannounced for a cuppa and chat, and still be there 4 days later. She was the friend you always dreamed of having, bonkers and beautiful as one friend put it. She was a great starter, be that creating a piece of craftwork, cooking her famous pineapple-upside-down-cake or starting a book club. The speed and energy with which she would create something instant and temporary came from her father Ivan, the longer lasting textile crafting from her mother. Saskia would see something dumped outside and change it into a piece of work; see it, change it, use it or wear it! She was a walking colourful ball of creation, Mia says. She was accomplished, vivacious, loyal, kind, and made friends easily – and kept them. She ran into life with both feet. She embraced life even as it threw some curved balls her way. She wore her heart on her sleeve and let everyone know what she was feeling in that instant. She would appear at your door at all hours in any emotional state and include you in her drama. She had a vulnerability that made us love her so much; the little girl inside was there even though she was an amazingly strong, capable, independent woman juggling a million things at once. Saskia was searingly honest, with herself more than anyone. She confronted herself. She wanted to be responsible for herself and a good mother to her beloved boys, and she worked at it. Gary will tell us more about their life together later. Saskia was the least lazy person in the world, even though she couldn’t always see that. She worked hard at her relationships, familial and friend, all of whom she loved with a fierce love. She was bossy, pushy, determined, yet in a good way. She wanted life on her terms, and if she wanted a little more conventionality than her own upbringing, then she achieved that too with Gary, Luke, Joe and her work. She adored the years with Alfredo and the happiness that brought her. For someone who was chasing the elusive butterfly of contentment, Saskia really loved her life. She told several friends how happy she was and how excited she was for the future. She felt truly, truly loved, and with good friends around her, and Susannah at her side reassuring her til her final breath, she was and still is, one of the most loved people. The outpouring of love sustained her, and should carry us, especially Luke and Joe, in its stead. The depth of feeling we have at her loss is tantamount to the largeness of her unique character. The liveliness of her being will resonate down the aeons. The defiant human spirit remains steadfast when we choose courage in the face of fear and uncertainty. Our spirit is unstoppable even if our bodies are limited. Life is not about the amount of days we have on this Earth, but about what you do with those days that allows you to live a remarkable life.